


Goodbye My Lover

by mindylu32



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-19
Updated: 2015-11-19
Packaged: 2018-05-02 10:50:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5245550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mindylu32/pseuds/mindylu32
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Damien Darhk has decided that the only way to bring down Oliver Queen is through the woman he loves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbye My Lover

**Author's Note:**

> Please note this is a one-shot and no other chapters are planned. (PS I suck at writing action sequences hence why there won't be any future chapters).
> 
> Also, I'm well aware that there is a lot of wrongness in my medical stuff but I'm not going for medical accuracy here. I hope you can look past it :)

“Felicity?” Oliver’s heart is pounding in his chest. Every nerve is standing on end he must find her. Then he spots something...a head full of golden hair. He sets out at a full run and once he reaches her he drops down on his knees beside her. 

He whispers, “Felicity are you alright?” When she makes no move to say anything and touches her hip to roll over when he feels it...the sticky feel of blood. He looks down and sees that she has blood all over her dress. “OH MY GOD...NO!” 

Oliver picks her limp body off the floor and sets out at a sprint. He runs down the streets of Star City for what feels like eternity until he makes it to Starling General. He walks in screaming, “help her....HELP HER WHAT ARE YOU DOING JUST STANDING THERE HELP HER!”

Oliver watches as they rush over and remove her from his arms and place her on a gurney. He answers numbly when they asked what happened, “she was stabbed.”

They rush her into a room and they won’t let him in. Why won’t they let him in. They hook up to monitors and he takes a small sigh of relief when he can here the small but steady rhythm of her heartbeat. 

He stands outside the door watching the doctors put tubes here and tubes there. Then he hears it...the most awful sound. Where there was a slow but steady beep letting him know that Felicity's heart was still pumping suddenly made the shrill noise of death. She was flat-lining. Oliver let out a howl "Felicity!" He rushed to be by her side but suddenly hands were all over him and he heard someone say "you can't be in here" and pushed harder. He had to be near her. He had to touch her. That sound was still echoing throughout the hospital along with the sounds of Oliver's cries...."I thought I could protect her. What have I done? She is my life. If she dies I die."

“Oliver...OLIVER”. 

Oliver turns to see Diggle standing there. He sees the look in his eyes when he glances at Oliver’s suit and the red blood splashed across it. 

“Diggle what if we were too late...what if I was too late.”

That sound was still making it’s shrill noise. Oliver’s knees buckled and he fell to the floor. He looked down at his hands and saw them covered in blood. Not just any blood but Felicity’s blood. He couldn’t stop them. The tears they rolled down his face and the sobs began to rack his entire body.

“Ollie,” came the soft voice of Thea beside him. Suddenly he was surrounded by both Diggle and Thea beside him wrapping him in their arms. Even with them there he felt all alone. This was his fault. If only he had kept them away from Star City. Felicity would still be alive. She would be safe and warm in his arms not the cold lifeless body he felt just minutes before. 

Oliver had never felt more vulnerable than he did right now. He was raw. His sounds of grief were echoing off the empty hospital walls. 

Then through the darkness he heard it...beep...beep...beep. He was sure it was only his mind playing tricks on him. He wasn’t this lucky. He was Oliver Queen. Nothing good ever happened to him with the exception of Felicity Smoak. She was his exception. If she died every good piece of him would die right beside her. He feared the monster he would become without her light to guide him. She was the light that kept his demons at bay without her the darkness would consume him it would eat him alive until there was nothing human left in him. 

“Sir?” came the soft voice of someone from the doorway. Oliver turned to see a doctor standing there looking at him with caring eyes. 

“Yes,” came the answer but it didn’t sound like his voice at all. It was dark and gruff from all of the screaming he suddenly became aware that he did. 

“We have her stabilized. I can’t guarantee for how long. Luckily, it appears no organs were punctured. However, we’re going to move her to ICU just to keep her under observation. Are you her husband?”

Suddenly images started flashing one of Felicity in a white wedding dress walking down the aisle smiling so bright that he was sure the sun was jealous; one of Felicity touching her very pregnant belly; one of Felicity holding a new baby in her arms; one of he and Felicity old together. 

Oliver had to choke down the scream that felt like ripping out of him, “Fiancé.”

Oliver watched almost in disbelief as the doctor went back in the room to get her ready to be transported. Oliver looked at Diggle and Thea and whispered, “How do I tell Donna? How do I tell her I couldn’t protect her daughter.” Oliver felt like he was on the verge of another breakdown when he felt the strong grip of Diggle’s hand on his shoulder, “Oliver you can’t do this. You can’t blame yourself. It will eat away at you and Felicity wouldn’t want that.” Oliver knew Diggle was right but the guilt had already settled like a knot in his gut. 

“Listen me and Digg will go get some coffee and meet you upsairs okay,” came Thea’s soft reply. He nodded his head and agreement and watched as they walked down the hall. 

He pulled the phone out of his back pocket and scrolled and found Donna’s name but his finger hovered over the CALL button. Before he could talk himself out of it further he hit it. 

Donna Smoak picked up on the third ring, “Oliver honey how are you?”

Oliver couldn’t control the smile that pricked at the sides of his mouth but it was quickly extinguished when he remember why he had to call her. He cleared his throat before saying, “Donna there’s been an accident...”

Oliver listened as Donna took in a large in take of breath and asked, “Accident?”

“Felicity. She’s at the hospital she’s in the ICU.”

All Oliver heard was the sound of a dial tone. He stared at his phone trying to will it to ring even though he had no idea what he would say. He knew Donna would be on the first flight to Star City and maybe by then he could have thought of the words to say. 

Oliver began to make his way up to the ICU unit. His steps were slow and sluggish. He felt as if his worst fear had been realized. This was different then the explosion at the restaurant on their first date. This time he could feel the life spilling out of her. 

Oliver saw Diggle and Thea standing outside her room and he could also see Thea holding a bag, “what’s that?” Oliver said while pointing at the bag. 

“I picked you up a shirt and some sweat pants at the gift shop. I figured you would want to get out of those.”

Oliver looked down at his blood stained suit. He took the bag from Thea and went to change. When he came back both Thea and Diggle were gone but there was a note sitting in the chair outside Felicity’s room that read, “We thought you’d like to be alone. Even if we disagree”. Oliver couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle at this. He stopped at the door afraid to step in. Afraid he was hallucinating her being okay...which in this moment was clearly a relative term. He was immediately stopped by one of the nurses who snipped and said, “Sorry visiting hours are over.” Oliver glared at her said, “Not for me”.

He didn’t wait for her to agree he simply walked in. He stopped and looked at all the machines hooked up to her. This was Thea all over again but this time it was Felicity. The person who made his life complete. 

He walked over and pulled a chair closer. He just sat there staring at her taking in everything about her. She looked so pale. He went to take her hand but saw that his hands were shaking. As soon as he touched her everything came crashing down around him again. He wasn’t sure how long he sat there and cried but it didn’t matter. He did remember at one time someone came in to get him to leave but the sound he made toward them gave them pause and they decided to leave him be. 

“Oliver.”

He turned to see Donna standing in the doorway. How long had he been here? He hadn’t moved he just stayed there holding her hand and willing her to open her eyes. To not leave him. 

Oliver got up and walked over to Donna and he was ready to make his speech but she grabbed him in a hug so tight he was sure she cut off his air. He didn’t expect this. He expected screaming and wailing but not this. 

As they broke their embrace Oliver rawly stated, “I wasn’t expecting that.”

Donna gave a sad grin and said, “I spoke to Mr. Diggle and saw you here with her. Oliver I can’t be angry with you. This isn’t your fault. I know how much you love my daughter and how much she loves you. Please don’t blame yourself. I don’t and I know Felicity wouldn’t either.”

Oliver felt like one of the weights had been lifted off his shoulders. Donna patted him on the arm and said matter of fact, “You stink.”

Oliver looked at her and she continued, “Listen go home and take a shower and I’ll take over the vigil.”

“But...”

“Oliver I will not argue about this. Go.”

The way Donna said “go” really left no room for argument. As much as it ripped his heart to leave Felicity he knew she was in good hands.

Oliver made a quick trip to the loft to shower and change. As Oliver stood under the hot water he could feel anger began to replace some of his grief. Damien had made the one mistake that would cost him his life. He had put Felicity at the edge of death and he would see to it that the world would burn down around him for harming her. As much as he wanted to seek out his vengeance he had to get back to Felicity first. Damien would meet his ending one way or the other. 

Oliver walked into the hospital room and saw Donna sitting there just chatting away and Oliver said, “Any change?”

Donna jumped, “Oh Oliver I didn’t see you there”.

Oliver walked over to stand beside her and Donna said, “I need to go grab a bite to eat,” and without saying anything else she walked out of the room. Oliver sat down and took her hand and started making circles with his thumb on her palm. 

“Felicity I’ll never forget the first time I met you. You made me see a part of myself that I was afraid had been lost for five years. Felicity you have to pull through this because I can’t...I can’t fight this battle without you. You are what I get up for every morning. I need you Felicity. Please...please come back to me.”

Oliver put his head down on the bed but continued talking, “Do you remember that time we were in Rome and....”

“And you wouldn’t ask for directions.”

Oliver’s head snapped up to see Felicity looking at him with such love and adoration. Then a smile cracked across her face, “I guess my mom didn’t tell you I was feeling better.”

Oliver let out a groan, “So you heard all of that did you?”

“Yeah I did. I particularly loved the part about me being the reason you get up.”

Oliver ducked his head then came her raspy voice, “Don’t. I loved them.”

Oliver could not believe she was here and that she was talking. His gut finally began to untangle and he felt the weight of the world had been lifted off of him. Oliver never wanted to imagine a world where Felicity Smoak didn’t exist. He knew he loved her and he knew he loved her deeply it was a love he had never before experienced. It wasn’t until he heard the sound of her heart stopping that he realized how important Felicity was to his existence. Every breath he took was all so he could love her. Felicity was his sun and his world revolved around her. 

Oliver felt the saltiness of his tears roll down his face as he said, “Felicity the last 24 hours have been the scariest hours of my life. I don’t know what I would do if I lost you. I just think of the darkness taking over and...”

“Shhh...Oliver I have faith in you. I know you and I know there is more goodness in you than you give yourself credit for. Promise me that if...that you’ll fight for that goodness. No matter what happens. The world needs you Oliver.”

Oliver watched as the tears rolled down Felicity’s face and he gripped her hand just a little tighter, “The thing is Felicity the world may need me but there is no me without you. You’re my everything.”


End file.
